🎸 Giraffe’s Band: Bad Decisions, Worse Priorities

Instead of getting a job, Giraffe decided to start a band.

His family is supportive. They believe in dreams, artistic expression, and “finding your sound.”

Emma Leviathan hates all of this. Emma believes in stability, responsibility, and paying the electric bill on time. The power company does not accept vibes.

Despite Emma’s very reasonable objections, auditions were held—and they were fierce.

Auditioning included Cheryl, Mel (from the Spice Girls), Turtle, Lemur, Koalified, and Donald Trump. Egos were high. Talent was debatable. Supervision was nonexistent.

Cheryl is fully convinced she is the best singer who has ever lived, crediting her raspy, smoke-soaked voice as “raw,” “emotional,” and “perfect for rock.” Emma would like to clarify that the room became cold and smelled like cigarettes.

Koalified auditioned despite the fact that he should be actively working on Giraffe’s legal case. Emma has concerns. Mostly legal ones. Some financial.

After chaos, campaigning, and zero adult oversight, the final lineup was decided by popular vote from the live chat.

 

🏆 Giraffe’s Official Band Lineup:

 

 

• Giraffe

• Donald Trump

• Cheryl

• Koalified

 

Democracy prevailed. Emma rolled her eyes.

Emma maintains that:

 

• Bands do not pay bills

• Giraffe has a family

• Someone needs to cover the electric bill

 

The band exists. The lights are still on. For now.

Emma would like it noted, for the record, that when the power goes out—she warned everyone.